I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize