what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
