Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
