Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
this hospital has no fireball
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
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