dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
whose ass print is on the piano?
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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