After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
