You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Randomize
