absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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