whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
