if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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