You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
