so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
