Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize
