Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
