We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize