It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
