you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Four minutes until I can fart!
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
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