she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
