Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
Randomize
