Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(856): View more from New Jersey

I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.

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(206): View more from Washington

remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?

(206): View more from Washington

joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!

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(612): View more from Minnesota

and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes

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(727): View more from Florida

Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.

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