spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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