i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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