Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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