he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I just blew my weed a kiss
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
