Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Randomize
