if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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