I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize