ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
