we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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