..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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