it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
