Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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