do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Randomize
