watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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