ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I've blown a few things in my day
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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