$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
he fucked my hip out of place.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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