we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Randomize