i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
