with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
