..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
