Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize