I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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