worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
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