no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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