Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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