she was so not down for the gang bang
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
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