i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Randomize
