The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
