On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
