Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
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