sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
