Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize